Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Darkness

Have you ever found yourself in a place you don't want to be in, you don't know how you reached, and you look around and wonder where exactly you took the wrong turn that brought you there? You want to retrace your way back and start the journey anew, but alas it's a one way road and the only steps you can take lead you further down that very road you're not comfortable walking on. What do you then? What do I do now? It happens to the best of us I hear, but the 'best of us' surely know a way to find their way out of this sticky situation, whereas I, the dimwit am only getting lost further in the darkness. I feel hopeless. I feel helpless as I find myself falling deeper into the crevices of holes I've dug for myself and I can't even scream out my fear. I feel helpless as an unknown, but real and physical, pain snowballs somewhere near my chest and it's all I can do from letting out the flood of tears I can't let anyone see. I feel helpless as the facade I've so carefully and painstakingly built is about to crumble and I'm once again about to see myself the way I really am. I feel helpless as I once again become the person I have been running away from all my life.

3 comments:

Unknown said...
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Unknown said...

I hope things are fine with you and I wish you get what you want....

erer said...

I think you know what you are talking about. I've been there. Just be honest with yourself and other around you. Sounds bookish na? Trust me it's the easiest way out to finding yourself again.

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